Tag Archives: Robin van Persie

WWRvPD?

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Will he sign a new Arsenal contract? Won’t he sign a new Arsenal contract? Who knows? And with a quarter of his (Robin’s) priestly vows fulfilled, we may not know for a while. Everybody and their long lost uncle are speculating on what Robin will do, claim to have some sort of inside scoop, reading tea leaves and body language to state their case, etc. This piece is much more introspective, reflective and soul searching. Objectively, what would you do if you were in Robin’s shoes?

I can only imagine Robin is sitting in the Dutch camp, thankful he doesn’t have to play with Nigel de Jong every day (you know what I mean – playing football on the same pitch), wondering what sort of fried delectable Andre Santos is munching on at this very moment.

But, seriously, what would you do if you were Robin? The way I see it there are three choices:

  • Sign a new contract
  • Do nothing and see out his existing contract
  • Force his way out of the team this summer

The amount of money he can make elsewhere is insane (the reports from MC and Russia are about Monopoly money salaries). And who among us wouldn’t be tempted? Don’t get me wrong, what Arsenal are (supposedly) offering would be more than enough for most of us and be a tidy sum to collect each and every week, but what would you do if you could get more? Imagine your own current job situation. You’re happy, you work with people you like, you make a good living – but somebody comes along and offers you double the amount you are currently making. You’d be crazy not to consider the offer (and possibly crazy not accept it).

I actually had this very situation happen to me. I run my own business and do well for myself, but a company in Arizona offered me easily 2X what I was making on my own. I eventually said no, but it took a tremendous amount of soul searching to make that decision. I made the decision because I run my own company, I love being in Austin (Arizona? Really?), I love the lifestyle running my own company affords me and my wife is established in her profession here in Austin as well. Tough decision, but I don’t regret if for a minute.

I suspect Robin, especially being the competitive person he is, is doing much the same right now. Of course I want him to stay at Arsenal, but I wouldn’t begrudge him the decision to move on from Arsenal if he does so.

What would you do if you were in Robin’s shoes? Take the poll and leave comments below.

Arsenal Player Ratings v. Newcastle United – Automobiles Edition

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If Arsenal don’t stop this, I’m going to be dead of a heart attack before we move into 3rd place. Four comebacks in four consecutive PL games (a record). Two at the death. In terms of a euphoric sensation, it doesn’t get much better than what we experienced on Monday against Newcastle United.

The game on Monday we obviously were about as sharp in front of goal as a rusty spoon. We played well in midfield, played well defensively, created the chances in front of goal, but suddenly it seemed as if the Arsenal players made some sort of crazy bet in the locker room to see who could come up with the worst whiff from six yards out or less. Robin set the tone early on, then Rosicky said, “Oh yea, watch this.” Not wanting to be left out of the betting pool, Gervinho had to work extremely hard to miss from that close.

However, I absolutely love, love, love the fight we are seeing in this team at the moment. The “never say die” attitude. Sure, we got kicked in the balls pretty hard a few times, but we stood right back up and executed a wicked crane kick to the solar plexus while balancing on a moderately mended leg. And the best part is we’re getting some key players back from injury at just the right time. Could you imagine Wilshere, Chamberlain and Song running rampant in the midfield? I digress.

Anyway, ten more games to go, 30 points at stake, 5 teams still swirling around the Champion’s League whirlpool. Must. Stay. Focused.

For this game, automobiles seemed appropriate – some are more finely tuned and crafted then others, and every once in a while even your $300,000 car won’t start and needs to be towed. The Arsenal player ratings, the automobiles edition:

Szczesny (Lexus) – A luxury sedan that performs solidly and stops goals like the one that was scored on Monday 9 times of out 10. He’s the real deal, no doubt about it. A definite upgrade at goalkeeper from what we’ve had in the past (a Yugo and a Pacer).

Sagna (Volvo) – I am, of course, referring to the old-school Volvo here when it was still a Swedish company. When they were nothing flashy but extremely reliable cars before they were bought by Ford (and now some Chinese group). Sagna provided a solid, reliable presence on the pitch that (it appears to me) frees up Theo to feel more confident on the wing.

Vermaelen (Bulgatti) – Has some reliability issues from time to time (first goal for Newcastle), but when he decided to shine he decided to shine in a very dramatic fashion and steal the show. Not to mention the full sprint from one end of the field to the other to be in position to score the goal.

Koscielny (Citroen) – Not just saying Citroen just because he’s French. Not really the most attractive car in the world, but world-renown for its comfortable ride. Koscielny doesn’t always play the most attractive football, but there’s a sense of comfort when he’s in the game. Like everything is going to be ok.

Gibbs (Honda) – Solid car, solid performer. Nothing out of the ordinary, but very reliable and dependable. Had a minor blip when he let Ben Arfa turn on him for the first goal, but had a solid game nonetheless.

Song (Mack Truck) – Solid, does a tremendous amount of dirty work, doesn’t complain, stands its ground and doesn’t look for accolades. Song was key in the midfield on Monday, breaking up plays, keeping Newcastle from getting into a rhythm and showing his defensive steel.

Rosicky (Audi) – My personal favorite car brand in the world. Sleek, precisely tuned, superb handling, crisp execution. The perfect culmination of grit and finesse partnered with determination and creativity. Rosicky was a force to be reckoned with in the middle of the pitch. I’m torn between him and Walcott as my MOTM.

Arteta (Ford) – Decent enough car and will get you from point A to point B most of the time. Behind European models in terms of quality and precision, but usually gets the job done. Sort of your “Everycar” if you will. That was Arteta’s game on Monday. Fairly mundane but enough.

Walcott (Ferrari) – Ferrari’s break down a lot and can be expensive to repair, but when all the pieces come together and work in harmony, holy shit! Speed coupled with technique and a bit of football intelligence thrown in and Theo is close to unstoppable. He may be completely unreliable for the next race, but he was absolutely fantastic on Monday. Speed kills.

Chamberlain (Aston Martin) – Smooth, elegant and surprisingly powerful and speedy when you least expect it. Has reliability issues from time-to-time as well, but a thing of beauty when it’s on the road an performing at its peak. Chamberlain is looking stronger and stronger each game, hungry to play, no fear, willing to shoot from the outside and take on challengers.

Van Persie (Monster Truck)— Elegance and refinement be damned, I’m going to be in your face and do what needs to be done. RvP missed a shot that he should have made, scored a key goal that needed to happen, and basically got in the head of Tim Krul and refused to back down. Left some tire treads on a couple of players Monday.

Arsenal Player Ratings v. Milan – Phoenix (not Arizona) Edition

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I don’t think I’ll add anything new to the conversation that hasn’t already been said about Arsenal’s near history-making performance against Milan on Tuesday. It surely was a bittersweet game that had hearts pounding, palms sweating and legs bouncing. How could you sit still? I couldn’t. I think I scared the crap out of my neighbors at one point. But that’s why we love this game (and especially this team).

The performance was very special. It shows what an Arsenal team that plays at a high tempo and with pace can do to nearly any team in Europe. I don’t think any team would have beaten Arsenal on Tuesday night – not Manchester City, not United, not Barcelona. Not even Real Madrid. AOC was an absolute revelation on Tuesday night playing in the central midfield role. Can you imagine a midfield with Song, Wilshere and the Ox on the field at the same time? With Rosicky and Arteta rotating in and out? And Ramsey, too, if he can ever get his shit together. Wow! It’s a very exciting time to be an Arsenal fan.

I normally go through and rate each player individually, but I think the Milan game showed a committed and inspired team effort – therefore, the team will be rated collectively. For me, the Arsenal team that played on Tuesday night feels a bit like the Phoenix rising from its own ashes to be reborn again.

The Arsenix -- kicking ass and taking names.

If you stop and think about where we started the season, and where we are now, it’s nothing short of remarkable. I can’t tell you how many times – according to press on both sides of the Atlantic, as well as a few fickle fans – we’ve been left for dead only to reemerge and confound the “experts.” We’re in 4th place, with a real chance to capture 3rd. I get there’s still a long way to go this season and a top 4 finish isn’t guaranteed, but this group of players should be extremely proud of the way it has overcome adversity and pulled together as a team.

I think the chemistry and camaraderie and fighting spirit on this team with RvP as captain is actually much stronger than last year’s team. Cesc is a supreme talent, no question, but he wasn’t the galvanizing force that was so sorely needed. And we won’t even talk about Nasri.

So, yes, I think the Phoenix is the appropriate symbol for Arsenal this season, and the essence of that Phoenix spirit was captured and on display against Milan on Tuesday night.

Arsenal Player Ratings V. Liverpool — Marvel Comics Edition

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How many times have we watched Arsenal dominate a game, take chance after chance, see the opposing goal keeper have the “game of his life,” only to witness a last-minute, last-gasp goal by said opposition on the single shot they happened to muster for the entire game and we all just sit there stunned?

Man, it sure feels good to be on the other side of that coin. While Arsenal weren’t completely dominated, they sure didn’t play their best game. A series of “coulda’, shoulda’, woulda’” moments should have seen Liverpool up by 2-3 goals at halftime. But they weren’t.

An absolutely beautiful day in Austin turned even more beautiful in stoppage time yesterday as Robin van Persie (aka Gandalf) used his wizardly leg to thump home a true gem of a goal to give Arsenal all three points.

Just when you thought it couldn’t get any better, an uninspired Chelsea bumbled off and lost to a dangerous West Bromwich Albion team, giving Arsenal a clear three point advantage in fourth place. It even cost AvB his job.

And to continue the theme of the beautiful weekend, Arsenal are now within striking distance of Tottenham after they fell to Manchester United. Ah. It’s glorious.

Yesterday felt like a couple of superheroes stepped up to help an otherwise pedestrian Arsenal team win the game. Maybe we can call  yesterday’s team the Arsengers. So in homage to yesterday’s superheroes, here is the Marvel Comics edition of Arsenal Player Ratings.

Szczesny (Hulk) – Szczesny was the freaking Hulk yesterday. He was completely undeterred, utterly focused and unwilling to budge an inch. The man in green kept Arsenal in the game. He even used his superhero powers to prop up a fallen teammate and wouldn’t let him feel sorry for himself.

Sagna (Hawkeye) – Played a relatively minor role yesterday, except for a pinpoint strike at a crucial moment that resulted in an RvP goal. Good support character that allowed the main characters in yesterday’s drama to take center stage.

 

Vermaelen (Patriot) – I’ve never really heard of Patriot before. He’s relatively anonymous in the Marvel universe as far as I can tell. That mirrors the type of game Vermaelen had yesterday – the slip at the beginning of the game nearly cost us a goal, but Hulk said, “No goal!”

 

Koscielny (Gambit) – Gambit turned on and attacked the X-Men at one point in his career, but eventually came back around because he loved Rogue too much and became a powerful member of the team. Besides, Gambit has a French name (yea, I know, Koscielny is French but his last name is Polish – bear with me here).

 

Gibbs (Mockingbird) – Don’t really know who Mockingbird is either, but needed another average superhero filler name to toss into the description. Gibbs played the role of supporting cast, but not much more.

 

 

Song (Wolverine) – Beat up, punched around, exhausted, but strong when he needed to be. Provided the decisive pass to RvP in stoppage time that cemented the win for Arsenal. I wonder if Wenger has considered moving Coqulein (when he’s back from injury) to DM and playing Song as the attacking midfielder/playmaker with Arteta playing in the deep lying role. Hmm.

 

 

Rosicky (Owl) – Who the hell is Owl? Exactly. He’s part of the Marvel Universe, but doesn’t play a role much beyond that. Don’t get me wrong, I think Rosicky still has a huge role to play for Arsenal this season, but in yesterday’s game he was fairly anonymous.

 

Arteta (Deadpool) – Taken down and completely reinvented as a new superhero (I’m actually looking forward to Ryan Reynolds playing Deadpool). Arteta was stretchered off and taken to the hospital – he was solid as a player prior to the concussion (and one of Arsenal’s more consistent players this year). But wouldn’t it be awesome if they implanted a series of more refined technical skills and deeper football intelligence to make him the best midfielder in the Prem? I wonder if Arteta has a biting sense of humor?

 

Walcott (Dr. Bong) – Completely useless superpowers (Dr. Bong can hit himself in the head because his head is a bell) that don’t seem to play any real role whatsoever in a combat situation. Theo has had his brain dead moments, but yesterday was even a new low for Theo. Looked clueless and scared. I wonder if a bong was used in the creation of this character or by the speedster yesterday?

 

Benayoun (Sue Storm Richards) – Also known as the Invisible Woman. He forget to turn on his shield powers. The invisible powers were stuck in a loop.

 

 

 

 

Van Persie (Thor) — Who else but Thor? At this stage, RvP is almost god-like. Some folks wish he had been cast out of Asgard even as recently as 2 years ago. But he rediscovered his powers, picked up Mjolnir and continues to lay his opposition to waste (as well as kick some serious ass).

Arsenal v. Tottenham — The Lord Of The Rings Edition

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It’s hard not to have a near-permanent smile etched on my face after yesterday’s game. There were some Spurs fans that showed up at Cuatro’s and were obnoxious as hell for the first 40 minutes, but the mood changed dramatically as the game pressed on. It was truly awesome.

The game was a tale of two halves. Not that Arsenal necessarily played poorly in the first half, but the second half was far more delicious and really washed the taste of cock out of the mouth.

The sharpness of the passing, the energy in the midfield, the quickness of Arsenal’s game in the second half (and toward the end of the first half) was a thing of beauty.

This post will be mostly positive, but I do have to say this. The game yesterday exemplifies why I both love and am frustrated by Arsenal in equal measure (ok, I really love Arsenal more than I’m frustrated by the club). We know they CAN play at this level. It would be nice to see us do so more consistently.

Ok, enough of the negative. Here are the player ratings for Arsenal from yesterday’s game:

Szczesny (Gimli) – Wasn’t the best player on the field for Arsenal, but certainly wasn’t the worst. Like Gimli, didn’t play a major role in the victory but had his moments. Also, wasn’t there a scene in on of the movies where Gimli stumbled awkwardly and fell down as the ball went over his head in slow motion and hit the back of the net?

Sagna (Legolas) – Strong, powerful and efficient in a very understated sort of way. Didn’t defeat Sauron all by himself, but the victory would never have happened without his involvement. The arrow into the back of the net for the first goal started the whole chain of events that led to the flaccid display by the cocks on a ball.

 

Vermaelen (Pippin) – He had a few anxious moments, especially at the beginning of the game, but improved as the game went on. Didn’t really emerge as a star of the game, but played a role throughout.

 

 

 

Koscielny (Ent) – Remember the scene in the Two Towers (I think it’s from that movie) when Saruman flooded the area around his tower to wash away the ents, but they just stood there and said, “Fuck You!” and proceeded to own his ass?

 

 

 

 

Gibbs (Merry) – See Vermaelen.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Song (Aragorn) – Solid on both offense and defense. Broke up the Spurs midfield, created chances on the offensive side of the ball, was everywhere he needed to be. Went off and found some dead guys to help Arsenal out. Solid, solid play from Song.

 

 

 

Rosicky (The Ring) – He ran the show. The game revolved around him in so many ways. Swift passing, energetic, strong in the tackle, sublime goal. I could go on and on about Rosicky. He was king-for-a-day yesterday. Others stole the spotlight now and again, but he was the glue that bound them together. One Ring to outplay them all, One Ring to pass to them, One Ring to bring them all and in the winning ways bind them.

Arteta (Arwen) – Stayed mostly in the background, but a solid presence nonetheless. When he did step onto the main stage, had a significant impact. Besides having doe eyes for Song, I thought I saw him trundling off with a sick hobbit across a river of horses at some point as Spurs players tried to cross the river and got crushed. Oh, and they both have pretty hair.

 

Walcott (Frodo) – Torrid in the first half and flailing miserably, I think he completed more passes to Spurs players than Arsenal players. But played a major role in the second half that completely changed the storyline and resulted in some sort of magical ring melting in Tottenham.

 

 

 

Benayoun (Samwise) – While technically Frodo’s constant companion, Benayoun had a very solid game. Nothing outstanding, but a key reason we controlled the midfield the way we did. Provided quiet support all around to the attacking force up front. Pretty sure he killed a spider at some point during the game.

 

 

 

Van Persie (Gandalf)— Wow! He conjured a moment of magic in the first half that completely turned the game around. The goal was stunning and Bergkamp-esque. Didn’t one of the UK announcers say his left foot was like a wand?

Arsenal v. Milan Player Ratings – The Star Wars Edition Redux

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The game against Milan today is either the hardest game to analyze or the easiest. No analysis. Pages and pages of analysis. They are both the correct approach in their own right.

The thing I can’t wrap my head around is the fact that many of the players on Arsenal are exceptionally talented players, but seem to suck collectively as a team. There’s something there just out of reach, just at the periphery of vision that flits away when you try to look at it directly, something that’s looked at through a lens coated with Vaseline.

The lack of energy and fight was obvious today. But why? Did Arsene not prepare his team properly? Did the players go on a bender in Italy last night? Were they scared of the San Siro? Were they overconfident? Do they not have a “winning mentality”? I don’t know. I’m not even sure Arsene knows the answer at this stage.

Sure, Ox and Henry injected some energy into Arsenal in the 2nd half, but it was more of a brief blip on the heart monitor rather than an electrifying, life-giving, game-changing experience.

It was as if the Arsenal players were wearing their lethargy boots. Maybe it was the equipment manager’s fault. He accidentally brought the lethargy boots instead of the “give a shit” boots. I’ve seen MLS teams play better. Hell, I’ve seen college teams play better.

I was going to use a different player rating system, but fuck it. If Arsenal can be lazy, I can too. It’s back to Star Wars. And there’s really only one character that sums up the play today.

Szczesny (Jar Jar Binks): Didn’t make any terrible mistakes, but no one’s getting a free ride today.

Sagna (Jar Jar Binks): For the first time in as long a time as I can remember, Sagna looked lost in a game.

Vermaelen (Jar Jar Binks): Really just had a shit game from beginning to end.

Koscielny (Jar Jar Binks): Ditto. And then got injured.

Djourou (Jar Jar Binks): “Djourou” <As you say his name, your head slumps down and your voice drops at the end>

Song (Jar Jar Binks): Other than Henry, probably was the best player for Arsenal — which isn’t saying much.

Ramsey (Jar Jar Fucking Binks): My mother always said that if I can’t say anything nice, STFU.

Arteta (Jar Jar Binks): Game passed him by.

Walcott (Jar Jar Fucking Binks): Did he even show up for the game? Was he on the field? Oh, he was?

Rosicky (Jar Jar Binks): The Little Mozart was most definitely not in tune today.

Van Persie (Jar Jar Binks): Ok, he was probably a bit better than that, but it’s a collective Jar Jar Binks moment.

Henry (Jar Jar Binks): He really tried to inject some life into the team, but the players already on the pitch would have none of it.